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Friday, July 13, 2007

ATTACHMENT


Definition: Exaggerated not wanting to be separated from someone or something. Because the label of "pleasant" is very relative and based upon limited information, Attachment includes an aspect of exaggeration or "projection
Being attached to things and people means to give them unrealistic attributes, to perceive them as being able to give us everlasting happiness and to see them as unchanging forms. Let's take the first; giving something or someone unrealistic attributes. When we fall in love with someone, we create this illusion that this person is perfect, that everything about them is beautiful and that we must be with this person or we will be unhappy. We "crave" this person and when we can't be around them, we grow love sick and miss that person.
‘Attachment’ is the root of human suffering. Basically, it is said that the more you are attached to the world of form the more you will suffer. And thus to become free of suffering, you must relinquish attachment.
These attachments can be in all shapes and sizes, but whether the subject of attachment is a job situation, a romantic relationship, a car, or the opinion of other people, ultimately it is always attachment to a thought; the common denominator of all things in the world as it relates to our perception.
When we are attached to a certain job situation, for example, we cling to some configuration of ideas about that job situation, such as all the reasons why you need that job to be happy. And the same thing goes for money, whether you have little or plenty, the attachment is always to the thoughts you project on it.
In order to be free of attachment, you need to see every object, situation, thought, PERSON etc., as disposable. Which may sound harsh, negative, fatalistic, and generally like bad advice, but seeing everything as disposable can be a tremendously powerful key to freedom from attachment. And be sure that in no way am I implying that you should look at the world in a negative way. It may seem like it at first, but let me explain.
you need to be willing to let go of ANYONE, anything and everything. This is not to say that you should give away all your things, end all relationships, and go live under a bridge. It is first and foremost an internal willingness to let go of anything you might have or expect to have; to approach the world with a general attitude of non-attachment. So for example if you win a million dollars in the lottery, non-attachment is to be internally willing to let go of it, to give it up. If you’re not willing to lose it, you are attached to it. And any attachment, however slight, will cause you to suffer.
in order to be free, you need to be in the world without relying on it for shelter. A way of being that allows everything to come and go, not clinging to anything that arises; to regard any form of external security as temporary, and being willing to relinquish all forms of outwardly derived pleasure or satisfaction.

The Buddha compared desires to being in debt. If you owe money to the bank for your house, every month you have to pay. In the end, you will own the house. With sensual desires however, you cannot pay off the debt; they arise again and again. Hunger, thirst, lust for sex, warmth, coolness, they all come back again and again. Trying to fulfill our desires is like carrying water to the sea; a never ending task and ultimately completely useless

8 Antidotes
ANTIDOTE 1 - Observe Yourself: Do I exaggerate positive qualities of things I am attached to, are they really worth all my troubles? Is it really worth to work hard for days, weeks or months to have an hour of fun?
ANTIDOTE 2 - Use Your Inner Wisdom: Discover how exaggerated attachment is and how desire works against oneself.
ANTIDOTE 3 - Reflect on the Unsatisfactory Nature of Existence. This is also called the First Noble Truth. How much fun is fun really, and how much is it forgetting the pain? Do desires ever stop or is it an endless job to fulfill them?
ANTIDOTE 4 - Reflect on Impermanence. How important is the person or object: everything will end someday, people die, things break.
ANTIDOTE 5 - Reflect on the Problems of Attachment. Lying in the sun is great, but it quickly leads to sunburn. Eating nice food is great, but it leads to indigestion and obesity. Driving around in big cars is great, but how long do I have to work to enjoy this?
ANTIDOTE 6 - Reflect on bodily attraction (lust for sex). Loving someone is great, but what happens when the "honeymoon-days" are over? But what is the body really? What more is it than a skin bag filled with bones, flesh, disgusting organs and fluids?
ANTIDOTE 7 - Reflect on the Results of Attachment. Greed and craving lead to stealing and all kinds of crime, including war. Addiction to alcohol and drugs are simply forms of strong craving; they destroy the addict and the surroundings. Uncontrolled lust leads to sexual abuse. The feeling of greed, craving and lust in themselves can be easily seen as forms of suffering.
ANTIDOTE 8 – the ultimate antidote to attachment and all other negative emotions is the realization of Death. What are all objects of attachment worth at "the moment of truth" or death?

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